Tenderness
by xipeek
Summary: The little moments behind the faberry friendship. Faberry friendship and maybe more.
1. I just need a little tenderness

Tenderness – I just need a little tenderness.

That's all she needed. Right this moment, she couldn't wish for anything else than a little tenderness. Quinn took her hand and starting gently brushing it with her thumb, remaining silent the whole time. Rachel couldn't help but notice the parallel with the restroom moment they had a few weeks ago. She didn't want to think of it as a favor though. She couldn't bring herself to think that Quinn was only doing this because she felt like she owned something to the brunette. Maybe she made it, maybe she finally managed to make a friend. She knew she had friends in the glee club, but Quinn was different. She felt it. She knew the blonde had done some things only out of interest, but she also knew that she could be a really truly nice and honest person. She believed in her. And, for now, she was proven right, because when she started sobbing again, Quinn simply put her arms around her and hugged her tightly. Rachel let her head rest on the blonde's shoulder and tried to forget about her humiliation on stage.

She had been let down by the one thing she had that made her so special. Her voice broke down on stage, and so did her.

Quinn was backstage, waiting for the end of the solo to come on stage. She glanced at Rachel every now and then who seemed like the light was emanating of her on the stage. When Rachel sang, Quinn felt like she was a complete different person. She forgot her jealousy and her resentment and just listened. And not once hadn't she marveled at how magical her voice was. How could such a little girl produce such an amazing sound?

Rachel always poured out her heart into her songs, especially solos. Sometimes it seemed like the words she sang hurt her physically. Tonight was one of these times. God knew that girl could talk, and she never stopped herself from doing so, but through songs she expressed herself, she exposed herself. She seemed so strong and so vulnerable at the same time that you didn't know if you wanted to hold her tight or bow at her. She was at the end of Get it Right when it happened. Quinn was listening and suddenly there wasn't anything to listen to anymore. The whole room stared at the brunette on stage. Rachel seemed petrified. She knew the song by heart, she wrote it for God's sake! Her voice just stopped and all of a sudden she felt a huge void filling her. Tears started rolling on her cheeks. She couldn't move, the audience was starring at her in confusion and she was stuck on stage, breathless, voiceless.

The whole glee club was starring too, and before anyone could say anything, Quinn got up on the stage, grabbed Rachel by the hand and pulled her out of the lights. She didn't stop when Finn asked what was wrong, or when Santana asked where they were going. She dragged the brunette to the restroom, and Rachel followed like she wasn't aware of her surroundings.

Quinn didn't say anything. She let Rachel lean against the sink, and regain a regular breathing. Tears were still falling down her cheeks. Mimicking the gesture the brunette had at the prom, Quinn wiped them away with her thumb. She didn't know why exactly she wanted to comfort Rachel. They had never really been friends, and yet she felt closer to her than to most of the people she called friend. Rachel got her. And she was there at prom, and when there was all this baby fuss. Rachel was there when people let her down. So she wanted to be there for her, too. She gently took her hand. The girls stand there still and silent until Rachel started crying more frantically. Quinn could only imagine how confused the brunette probably felt. So she hugged her.

Rachel felt more grateful this moment than any other moment in her life. She didn't know what happened back there but Quinn didn't ask. She didn't want to talk about it. She wasn't even sure if she could still talk. They hugged, and Quinn made them sway ever so slightly, and whispered into Rachel's ear that everything would be okay. There was no reason, no grounds to this friendship. But from now on they had each other. Rachel pulled back a little to face Quinn.

"Thank you" she said, forgetting that minutes before she wasn't even sure if she could talk.


	2. Divided They Fall

_Later_

**Divided they fall**

Finn was the link between them. The only tangible link. Quinn never admitted that if she gave up on him, then she would have nothing in common with Rachel anymore. She thought about it of course, because she couldn't count the times when she wondered if Finn was worth all this drama. But she would never admit that Rachel was the real goal, that Finn was just her excuse to care so much about the little brunette who started to turn her life upside down some time ago. Because then she would have had to start thinking about her feelings, her confused feelings towards the brunette. And she wasn't quite ready for this yet.

They had bonding moments. They had their moments, and Quinn was starting to think that maybe Finn wouldn't be that much needed anytime soon. She hated herself for thinking like this, but Rachel had that effect on her. She would make her do the most impossible things to get closer to her. Like going back to Finn when she wasn't really interested in him just so that she could have the upper hand on Rachel. As long as she was with him, Rachel would look at her. Well, look at him first, but then she was in the picture, too. Finn will screw up her plan and dump her first some time later, but of course she didn't know that yet.

Then these moments happened. The prom night, and that night at their charity concert when Rachel broke down. Not Rachel, her voice, but Quinn knew that it was kind of the same. They sat next to each other on the ride back to Lima. Quinn had stared down any question of the Glee club on their way out of the bathroom, and Rachel had mumbled a few words about a cold or something, like it explained everything. They didn't exchange a word on the bus, but Quinn had once again took Rachel's hand, and she'd let her. She had even squeezed it at first.

"I'm breaking up with you" Finn said with watery eyes. He didn't look at her.

Quinn stared at him with fear in her eyes.

"Because you're still in love with Rachel?" she asked, eventhough she knew the answer already.

Finn didn't answer right away and it only confirmed the blonde's worry. He was in love with Rachel, and she knew Rachel would fall into his arms as soon as she'd know.

He tried to explain his bond with her and all she wanted was screaming. She wanted to scream that no, he hadn't that bond with her otherwise he wouldn't have let her go this way. She wanted to scream her feelings about her, that _they_ had something, that it was worth more than the stupid high-school lover relationship Finn and Rachel would ever have. Instead she said:

"No, we're not breaking up; I can handle your confusion with Rachel until you get over it…" and she continued, using the pretext of prom queen and king again, like she even cared.

Finn got mad and said something about feelings, and Quinn tried to remember the hand holding, and the hug, and it helped because yes, she had feelings, a lot of feelings actually, thank you very much. Just not directed to the right person. She didn't realize she was crying until Finn apologized:

"Quinn, I'm sorry, I still love you" he said, trying to grab her arm.

That jerk. It was just too much.

"Just don't touch me" Quinn said, getting out of the car.

And that was it. Again.

Rachel heard the door of the car bang and saw a flash of golden hair rushing out of it. She wanted to enjoy the fact that Quinn had another fight with Finn, yet she found herself worried about the blonde. She looked at Kurt who was walking with her, and he nodded toward Quinn. Not taking the time to question that gesture, she rushed to her.

"Quinn wait!" she shouted, trying to catch up with the blonde.

Quinn turned her head, a surprised look on her face, but kept going anyway. She headed back in the church and to the bathroom.

"Hey" Rachel said, pushing the door open lightly and entering the bathroom. "What's wrong?" she asked with concern in her voice.

"You perfectly know what's wrong Rachel!" Quinn snapped immediately like she was waiting for the question to let it out. Tears were still rolling down her cheeks. "You don't need to pretend that you care!"

Quinn was staring at Rachel, defying her to lie. She tried to shut the voices in her head telling her that maybe she really did.

"I do" the brunette said softly. "Care, I mean…Not, I'm not pretending…"

Rachel didn't blink or look away. She just stared back into the brown eyes, getting lost in the moment. They seemed destined to never have a proper conversation outside of bathrooms. Quinn gave such intensity to things that it was difficult not to just stand there and let it embrace her.

"Quinn maybe… maybe we should just admit that, despite our disputes, we get along together… sometimes…in bathroom mostly, she added and earned a shy grin from the blonde in front of her. She took a step forward and her hesitating hand reached Quinn's. "I'm sorry, I mean, maybe you don't believe me because I still have some confused feelings for Finn, but I really am. I'm sorry that things didn't work out your way…"

"…again." Quinn finished.

Rachel slightly nodded in agreement, her eyes fixed on their joined hands. When she looked back up, she was welcomed with wary eyes.

"I still don't know what to think about you Rachel." Quinn admitted. "And yet here am I, telling you this because you're the only one who bothered. Am I invisible to the others? Can anybody care about me for once?" her voice broke and her eyes filled with tears again.

"You're not invisible Quinn. What's invisible for you are the walls you've built all around you. People see them, they see them before seeing you." Rachel explained, taking the other hand of Quinn in hers.

Quinn lightly tilted her head to the side, asking: "What about you then?"

"I don't know… I don't…care, I guess? About the walls or things people do to push me away. I mean, if I did, if I didn't try to go through these walls then I'd be even more alone than I am and...I can't…"

"You're not alone Rachel." Quinn smiled. A small and shy smile, but a smile anyway.

"I know that now Quinn, and that's why I'm here. We may not be the best friends of the world, but you've been there and I want to be here to." Rachel admitted. She couldn't really say why though.

When they left the bathroom, the small talk had replaced the tears. Quinn didn't want to think about her feelings. She didn't even want to feel anymore. The presence of the small brunette by her side was soothing her, and it was more than she could expect.

Maybe it was this sort of relationships. The sort of relationship that, at the very beginning, is the opposite of love at first sight. The sort of love that starts with a fight. Maybe deep down, the first time she saw her, she already knew. Maybe she thought to herself: "Well, this could be amazing. But it could also hurt." So she hated her from the start, because it was easier. She kept her distances, like it was dictated by some survival instinct. But she could only keep pushing away a friendly hand that many times before giving in. Wait, did she say love?


End file.
